The Farmers Market Dictionary

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After going to a fair share of Famers Markets, wineries, and hipster venues, I've realized that certain words make things snobbier and more desirable. It doesn't necessarily mean these goods are better or even good for you, yet you're drawn to them. You, my friend, are being fooled by very clever marketing. Here is your Farmer's Market dictionary. (All in good fun.)

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Local

I picked some weeds down the road and now I'm selling it at the Farmers Market- it's local!

Free Range

The animal may still be confined to a dark room. On an another note, I enjoy seeing a photo and bio of my chicken before I eat her eggs.  Vital Farms, I am not being sarcastic.

Artisan 

What a strange word to use to describe sandwiches and coffee and cheese.

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Hand Crafted

This item may not work properly and is very fragile and extremely expensive. Also it's a weird way to describe coffee: I hand crafted this coffee with my $10,000 grinder and a 9 bar espresso machine. 

Dry Farmed

You probably think I'm making this term up. I really am not.

Organic / Non-GMO / Omega - 3

These terms make for very stressful decisions at the grocery store. .

 Grass Fed / Omega - 3

It is up to you whether you would like to eat chicken eggs from chickens who were fed Omega 3 grains or not. It is also up to you to determine if it even makes a difference. Choose wisely

Exotic

I've shipped this from India and am selling it at a 500% mark up.

Fair Trade

This term is meant to give you the feels, just like Toms shoes. 

Craft

Not to be confused with Kraft Mac & Cheese.

Glass Bottles

This is not a term, but once you start buying milk in glass bottles, you never go back.  It makes life and grocery shopping very inconvenient.

I'll admit, some of these words hold more value than others. I implore you to do your research before buying into these attractive terms. You dont want to be that girl that buys the pesticide free $8 asparagus only to find it developing mold a few days later. Do you know any other snobby food terms? Comment below!

 

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